• About a Year Later...

    Over a year has passed since my participation in the 100 Day Project and my perspective on the creative process has changed. I started out creating every day, up to 2-3 pieces a day and continued at that pace, well after the end of the 100 Day project. By November, I was completely burned out and exhausted from working a 9 to 5 followed by 2 hours in the studio. The truth of my current situation is that I've struggled to make my way back to creating on a consistent basis. The wall I hit at the end of last year was a hard one. It knocked me down, and I'm still trying to pick myself up. Stress has been a major factor in my creative process. I was working long hours during the week as well as through the holiday. This resulted in extreme burnout as well as an infection which lasted for 2 months. Self-care was never a priority for me in the past, but now it's become the main focus of my life. The body always knows when something is wrong. I will make it a priority to always listen to what my body is telling me. It's important to realize that the body is what allows us to create and inspire. Self-care is number one. My goal is to now get to the studio twice a week and once during the weekend. Creating will now be a piece of self-care, instead of a means to an end.

  • A Week Later

    I've been in the space for a little over a week, and in that time I've had a love-hate relationship with my process. The first night I went to the space paint, the energy just felt wrong. I couldn't get anything down on paper that I liked, and I even hesitated when placing any mark. On top of that, I had to walk down a dark and creepy alley to get back to the train. Ugh. The second night went a lot smoother. I got there at a resonable time and started to settle into the space. As of now, I've developed a routine and I've set boundaries for the space. "No phone calls, while in the space and avoid texting". The blocked off time is only for creating and being in solitude. I've learned how important it is to my sanity to distance myself from it all. I need to be able to be alone with my thoughts and ideas, so that they can remain untarnished by what others think. I re-read The Crossroads between Should and Must" by Elle Luna and I've re-affirmed myself that it is ok to not know the "Why" just yet, but it is important to learn the "What". I don't exactly know "Why" I felt I needed to get this studio (I could have painted in my room), but I do know "What" I'm doing there. I'm there to explore, to take risks and to step outside of comfort zone.

  • Changes.....

    Change and risk have always given me extreme anxiety...I think this is the reason I never talk about what I'm up to. I tend to just do it, then I panic and after I realize it's not so bad. Last week I decided I needed a major change in my art practice. I went to go see a tiny art studio in Brooklyn, not really thinking anything would come of the situation. I got to the space earlier than expected and waited patiently in the lobby. When I saw the space I was taken aback at just how "tiny" the studio was. A whopping 40 sq.ft! I was surrounded by four walls with, barely enough space to stretch. I asked her how many other people were interested and she said a couple people were and that she couldn't guarantee that the place would still be available the next day. I hadn't brought my checkbook with me, so she told me if I wanted the place to call her the next morning when they opened. After I left, I called my Dad and asked him what he thought of the price and space. His answer was he had no idea what I should do. Which made sense, considering he doesn't live in NYC and isn't familiar with the crazy Real Estate market. The only thing he said was that I knew how I wanted to work and that if it didn't like it, it’s only a one-month lease. And it's true; it is only a one-month lease. At first I saw this as something negative, but it allows more flexibility in my decision-making. If I don't enjoy it, I can return to making art in my room. If I do, I can try to get another available space at the same location or find one in a different location. Needless to say, I called the place back and I asked if I could put a security deposit on it! So starting tomorrow I have a new, tiny art studio in Brooklyn. I feel anxious, but I do not regret the decision I made. I will need to readjust my schedule, which will take some time, but I'm excited for this new adventure. 

    “Action is the foundational key to all success.” - Pablo Picasso